Off to Colombia!!!!

PREFACE

Only 1 promise for myself this time: will write my blog! Hate myself of not doing it since I am on the road – last 6-8 years – as I literally forget everything! How will I write my books (I already have the titles), when I do not remember what happened and especially not the feeling while it was happening. Problem is, when it is happening have no time to do it; when it is over I am too sad and do not want to write about it. Anyway, this time really want to write it! However, again, still no idea what language- English seems the farest away from me, Spanish would be the most approrpiate as everything happens in Spanish and Hungarian the closest and more needed – but English is understood by 95% of those who might read it.

Same issue with the sytle – if diary, well, too personal, will not put it online; if just descriptionof what is happening with me, well boring for most of people, still useful for me as I forget everything; if description of the place and life here, boring for me but most interesting for the others.

So at the end I decided just do it as it comes.

INTRO

As always – and sadly almost exclusively – I am writing on the plane trip on the way to the new place of my life! I like long trips – train in Europe, plane out of the continent – as you stay time- and spacelessly in the middle of the nothing (especially when you do 24 hour flights with the sun never going down, like me now...no idea anymore which day, months, continent or world I am J). I like it, as it is a transfer from one part of my life to another one, at least the last few years, this is the tendency.I have time – between two turbulences – to think it over what happened, how did I get here, where am I heading and especially how it will beJ

COLOMBIA

I usually do not have any expectances, as it always turn out as it has to be, often the worse places the best experiences and vice-versa. But now, I am a bit afraid, I might have too high expectations. Seems like I am going to live in the paradise for Maya. All the things Colombia is famous for seems like made for me on purpose. The music, the continous dancing, the culture, the Carribean, amazing people, the jungles, the mountains, the food, Marquez, Shakira, the latinos, the language, the natural and cultural trips you can make, a huge highly developed city with everything what you need from posh parties to Bohemian little old style barrios, indigenous people, ancient cultures,etc. and even professionally, all the big organizations are here, unfortunately there is work to do for humanitarians, and it is still in Latin-America! Hey, and I am not even there!!! But what can you expect from a country where the major international airport is called: El Dorado J

AND ABOUT ME & COLOMBIA

This is about Colombia....and about me, why am I going there exactly....well hard to say why exactly, but now I feel like this is the turning point finally. Last year I found what I really wanted to do and my interest was just growing with the studies during this year and now I have to start it and do it! which is quite stressful as well for the impossibility of finding starter job in the sector. However if not here, than nowhere, so really stressed as I do not even have my thesis/investigation topic yet...even though I had to hand it in in February, which I did, but kind of changed it totally since then, mainly depending on what are the interests, needs of the organizations already working on the field as I do not see the sense to write another useless paper. Anyway in 3 months – which is the official period of our scholarship – it is quite impossible to have a normal research of a conflict which goes on 40 years now and anyway it takes years to make a proper research. So the plan is to find and organization interested in my topic – preferably one which in the future would be able and willing to hire me ;) – and make the research connected to them and finally write my thesis about it. Unfortunately what I am interested – and I consider easier employment in the future as climate change and natural disasters are quite „fashionable” nowadays – is DRR, CCA, vulnerability studies, local coping strategies,etc,etc (Sorry for those who dont get these terms, I guess this whole section of my career side might be boring anyway). However apparently Javeriana – the uni where I am heading for the research in cooperation with NOHA – is interested only in the conflict and everybody else and climate displacement does not really exist officially, as they already have 3-4 million displaced due to the conflict. So lets see, as obviously, even I am not prepared at all of the topic. There were wayyyyyyy toooo many things happening last months.

CURRENT FEELINGS

Other than the excitement of Colombia – which came 1 day ago as I had no time even to think about it – I am deeply sad with mixed feelings of nostalgia, pain, sadness….I feel I will rarely be so happy as I was in Bochum with my people…always depends on the people how do you feel and other than in Italy and Pakistan, I never had such a great group, friends, social life, flatmates, collegues and all this the same people! I know we complained a lot and I am still really not satisfied of so many things I got for so much money, especially knowing that it would be possible to do it much better, but me personally, learnt sooo much in 1 year than never before. Obviously have to consider that often – maybe half of the time – we learnt only by ourselves or from each other. And after the initial period of high expectations, when we realized that nothing really will be like we wanted, I tried to concentrate on what was great here: the people and the things we were doing! I might will have to work at the end of the world totally alone, where I will be able to work a lot, but will not have any people. So lets enjoy what we have so shortly, as time went really slow at the beginning but then just flew away so fast, I could not get it in my head that it is over…I still feel I just left for a weekend again (as I did probably too many times during the semester visiting Rebeka Cambridge, GLEN camp and family in Poland, Egypt with family, a trip home, Spanish seaside with Gustavo, Brussels twice to visit the others and practice some French and some other minor local trips.Also my visits, mum, sister, Guszti,almost never alone. So seriously, I will never be in such a great group, where everybody is cool and interesting and international and just sooo nice to be with, in such an amazing flat with so little money, with sooo amazing flatmates (Thanks family Andrea y Ximena)such a cheap life (well after Dublin everything is relative), free transportation and still, I was studying and daily dealing with issues I am really interested, so much wanted and finally I know what I want!!! and then I even got a boyfriend after long years of having “fun” all over the world! (hugs honey J) but this part is too personal, that is why I hate blogs, I should stick to diary and cut out the over 18 and private parts ;)

So love you all, will be a big hole in my heart :S missing all the crazy things we did together….it was one of the very few moments when I could be myself and they still accepted and loved me….almost never happens, in Europe people are cold and closed, out of Europe often friendly by interest with me..and then when you work – and not just study – relations are really different, can not be just friends without any individual interest, helping even if you are in the other group.

And lets be honest, we still learnt something, especially to be really critical with all this humanitarian stuff J and about geopolitics and different conflicts all around the world, the situation of these countries, how to conduct a measles vaccination campaign or to count the under 5 mortalities and public health, learnt a lot about toilets (JUHUUUU!!!), “anthropological” dilemmas on why on erath are we doing this, what are our motivations and are not we just selfishly dumping them with staff they do not need while destroying what they would have done anyway; how to manage a disaster logistically, evaluation, HR, finance and all the best Irish NGOs, organizations,donors visiting us…then how to create an NGO (which we will never use) and how to write loads of papers J ok, can not write anymore now..almost 24 hrs on the way…write you soon!!!!

Bye Bochum :(:(:(, welcome Colombia!!!!